:((((

-butterflies flying aimlessly in my tummy?-

I've got everything planned out nicely for tmr but yet i feel uneasy. :(

Actually i don't even know if this is what i want. But given the pathetic situation that i haven't been offered anything else... guess i'll have to go give it my best shot after all. Sigh.

I was totally put down by my mum today. She said such just-kill-me words that ripped my heart apart. Well i cannot just pass it off as her style because she's always doing this and why have my sis and i always fallen prey to her tyrancy. I love her love her love her. Yes i shall still love her because she is my mum.

I think my mind's been floating to all edges of this earth because I've had so much free time on hand to think about everything such that i wished i hadn't begun thinking in the first place.

Retail therapy feels great but really taxing on the poor little nets card that has been swiped more times than i can remember. :(

Still can't decide on what to wear for the interview. To look teacher like, working class like or.. student like? *scratches head* sigh.

It dawned upon me that I've been such a pest for having complained endlessly all my life about how i look and for having fats hang out from all over the place. Because halleluia! i don't give a damn anymore! haha.. I shall hold my head up high and love myself for who i am as a whole and not make myself to become what others perceive to be beautiful because it's just so tiring trying to force yourself to be what others like. Besides, whoever said that fat girls can't have their own unique style right!

I told my colleague i was boyfriend-less and happy. And she told me that ya.. it was cos of my height and size... well i'd admit i was sad for a day, but everything's fine the next day and i still go about my daily routine, constantly trying to add more colour and spice to the drilling boring typical life of a working girl. I mean can you imagine if i let that bring me down for a few days? Boy would my life be filled with sadness and nothing else..

SO, heck whatever people say, or perhaps brood about it for one day at most, and then forget about it! We are the way we are because that's how god created us right? Forget about all diets and slimming scams. Love yourself for who you really are.

I've said my piece. For once I'm really at peace with myself.:))))